Memories are like rules. Some of them are so stifling, so debilitating. These need to be slain. In Mallias, the Greek Gangster, Markella deals with that. She wrote in her journal:
“… Rules don’t exist only on paper. Actually, they don’t ‘exist’ on paper. They are only ‘printed’ on paper.
They ‘exist’ in our minds. Rules are ‘written’ in our minds. That is where they truly ‘exist’. The rules are printed out in our minds, words black, stark, firm, on the white pure canvas.
Printed papers. Printed minds. We get trapped by their black and white.
Rules, rules, rules. Some of them don’t work.
It really doesn’t matter if the rules which don’t work for you are on paper. If they don’t work you can rip them up.
It matters, though, if the rules that don’t work well are in your mind, it matters if your mind knows them, hears them. The rules that are written in the mind are the ones that definitely need to work, otherwise, they will plague you. Otherwise, they need to go.
If the rules that have been set in your mind don’t work, they need to be washed away.
The rules that have settled in the mind are the hardest ones to change. You can’t just rip them like paper.
If you unsuccessfully try to change them, ignore them, or work around them, they fight back. They spray you with guilt. Or they torment you with doubt. Or they make you feel vulnerable.
That is why these rules that don’t work are like nasty weeds. They need to be eradicated….”
Mallias The Greek Gangster